Party Like It's 1989!

You can see from the picture above the wildly exciting time that was had by all at the big party last night. For those of you not aware, I am at the Cisco Networkers conference in San Francisco this week. This is the 20th anniversary of the conference. Every year they have a customer appreciation event which varies in location and entertainment depending on the year and city of the conference. This year the them was Party like it's 1989 in honor of the 20th anniversary. Every year this also always some sort of hat that is given to all attendees. As you can see from the picture above, this year's hat was a big success and there were no discarded ones on the way out for me to scavenge to bring home for all the kids.

The party was on Treasure Island in the middle of San Francisco Bay and featured a bunch of carnival rides/food and an 80's concert hosted by Martha Quinn from MTV way back in the day. They had the lead singer from Flock of Seagulls, The Sugarhill Gang, Tone Loc, Howard Jones, Tears for Fears, the Bangles, Devo, and the B-52s. Despite the fact that the temperature was around 45 degrees and the wind was a constant 20 mph or so, a good time was had by all.

I know what you are all secretly thinking, so let me just confirm that you are correct in your suspicion that your lives are pathetically sad and empty because you really haven't lived until you've spent 4 hours freezing your butt off on a July evening in the middle of San Francisco Bay with 10,000 drunk networking geeks all wearing Devo hats singing along with a bunch of singers/bands that haven't performed in so long that they themselves have forgotten the words to their own songs. (Susanna Hoffs forgot the words to Walk Like an Egyptian. It was okay, though because she looked fabulous while forgetting them...) ;-)

Swine Flu

New Government Mascot

Needs...

I wasn't going to do this since I figured everything would be boring, but that doesn't appear to be the case so I guess I'll post mine.

1. Chris needs to type 'chris needs' into Google for a blog - This is apparently getting around...
2. Chris needs new Paris Hilton sex video - I don't think so. She looks like a ferret.
3. Chris needs a wee wee - no comment
4. Chris needs to give me cancer - seems like an odd request...
5. Chris Needs, who appears to be a musician from Wales...
6. Chris Needs is a well-known face and voice of Wales
7. Chris Needs: My Autobiography - Boy, this guy is getting a lot of publicity out of this thing.
8. Chris needs your sex talk - 'nuff said
9. Chris needs your votes for the EVMAs! - True. I would love to win a European Video Music Award...
10. Chris Needs MBE on MySpace Music - Can't get away from this guy.

The Black Bra

SC sent me this humorous story in an email a week or so ago. Interestingly, I believe that we find it humorous for completely different reasons. Read the story and then my analysis of why it is funny below:

I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and of course I have been married for 20+ years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by wearing a black leather bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes. We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes. Here's how it all went.

My engaged friend:The other night my boyfriend came over and found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams. I love you'. Then we made love all night long.

The mistress:Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels and mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.

Then I had to share my story:When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said, "What's for dinner, Batman?"


Now the reason SC and I would suppose most other vaginal Americans would find this amusing is the obvious "What's for dinner, Batman?" punchline. On the other hand, what I and I would suspect most other husbands find amusing is the very notion that any woman married more than a year, let alone 20+, would ever decide on her own to greet her husband in this manner in the first place.

Hundreds Gather to Protest Global Warming

Super Bowl Seat

A Steeler fan had 2 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl.

As he sits down, a man comes down and asked the man if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.

"No", he said, "the seat is empty".

"This is incredible" said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting event in the world, and not use it?"

Somberly, the man says, "Well...the seat actually belongs to me. I was supposed to come here with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Super Bowl we have not been together since we got married in 1967."

"Oh I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else - a friend or relative or even neighbor to take the seat?"

The man shakes his head, "No. They're all at the funeral."

Steelers in Space

http://anon.nasa-global.edgesuite.net/anon.nasa-global/ccvideos/steelers.asx

How Beer Goggles Work

16 Things

1. I split MY chin open (and knocked myself out) by attempting to jump from the top of one counter top to another across a hallway at my parents house when nobody else was home.
2. I had scarlet fever in first grade.
3. In pre-school another kid jumped off a jungle gym onto the top of my head and I bit through the middle of my tongue and required many stitches to fix it.
4. Some day I will summer in Montana and winter in Bora Bora.
5. If my rude parents hadn't given me crappy eyesight I would have joined the Navy and become a pilot and might have been the one landing that plane in the Hudson River yesterday.
6. The first time I met SC, I was trying to check my score on an 8th grade Algebra test in her 9th grade homeroom and she slammed the door in my face while making rude comments about 8th graders coming into her room. You can understand the immediate attraction...
7. I played ice hockey for Norwin in high school. I haven't skated in at least 15 years, but I would love to find somewhere to play again.
8. Mint chocolate chip ice cream with melted peanut butter on top sounds like possibly one of the worst things you could possibly eat.
9. I frequently consider quitting my job and becoming a driver for UPS. I'd rather be a bush pilot in Alaska, but since I don't have a pilot's license and I do have a driver's license...
10. SC believes that I have another wife and 4 daughters on the left coast.
11. I have been to 39 states and 11 foreign countries and am always looking for a reason to go to somewhere new.
12. I have a Microsoft Map Point map on my laptop where I keep track of all the counties in the US that I have been in. Keeping track of only states isn't detailed enough for me.
13. I have about 520 titles on DVD and yes, I know when one is not in it's proper place on the shelf.
14. SC sincerely believes that whatever I am doing at any point in time is orders of magnitude less important than whatever it is she has suddenly decided I should be doing.
15. Relating to #14, I am being dragged over to karate against my will even though they are closed to go through some farce of doing something I could easily do at home so I can get class credit. The fact that I can know my form and everything else I need to know for testing and not pass pre-testing until I get 18 classes in, but other people can pass by getting 18 classes in without being able to do their form irritates me beyond words.
16. The final half season of Battlestar Galactica starts tonight at 10:00 on scifi. If you haven't watched before, you can view the catch the frak up video at the top of my blog to get up to speed.

Go Steelers

Greener Grass

Its important in life to reach out,
to strive for greater achievements,
to go for that greener grass that is on the other side of the fence.

But one must also be careful
Sometimes you can reach too far !


But when you find yourself over-extended and
you're stuck in a situation
that you can't get out of, there is one thing
you should always remember.......
Your government......


Is there to help you!!!!